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Tuesday, 18 December 2012

Not So Short Review: The Twilight Saga Breaking Dawn Part 2

Apparently this is not my review because I haven't had chance to watch it (yeah again), but I find a complete review for it. Read if you haven't watch it (like me!)

Read it only if you're interested. I don't want you to start bashing on the movie just because you don't like it. Team Edward!  =P

She’s earned it – and, let’s face it, so have we. Having moped and Goth’d her way through three instalments of the Twilight saga, trying to choose between two mutant swains – sensitive vampire Edward (Robert Pattinson) or shirtless wolf-boy Jacob (Taylor Lautner) – then sunk into outright masochism in Breaking Dawn, Part 1, where love-making turned her into a mass of bruises and her unborn baby nearly tore out her innards, Bella (Kristen Stewart) finally gets empowered in the fifth (and last) chapter, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2. Or, as they should’ve called it, ‘The Twilight Saga: I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar’.
Bella’s now a vampire – and not just a vampire, but the strongest vampire in the house. She proves the point by arm-wrestling macho blood-sucker Emmett, then pulverises a rock with her bare hands – just for fun! She goes hunting, and barely restrains herself from feeding on a hapless rock-climber (she compromises on a mountain lion). She’s stronger than Edward, her husband, who’s now little more than a decorative presence; his main role is to stand back and grin crookedly at her awesomeness, and of course offer himself for endless sex. Jacob has it even worse, his mere smell now odious to the undead Bella. All he can do is hang out on the sofa and watch as Bella raises weird little Renesmee, her child with Edward – but first he gets beaten up by his erstwhile beloved for calling the child ‘Nessie’ (“You nicknamed my daughter after the Loch Ness monster!”) and also having “imprinted” on her, described by disgusted Bella as “some erotic wolfy thing”. That’s right folks, an “erotic wolfy thing” on a newborn baby. You bad dog! 
Actually, the “imprinting” is almost irrelevant. One might wonder why the franchise makes such a big deal of this (it was the cliffhanger twist in Breaking Dawn, Part 1) when all it really means is that Jacob is devoted to the child, and willing to stay for her sake; it’s really just a way of keeping him around after Bella makes her choice of suitor. Nothing is done with it, nor is Jacob much of a character anymore – his only function is to act as a getaway wolf in the final battle, on which more later.
That’s not the only thing one might wonder about in this flimsy movie (I assume the book made more sense). Trouble starts when another vampire glimpses Renesmee from a distance and thinks she’s an “immortal child”, duly informing the Volturi who decide to wipe out Edward and his family – but it’s not clear why this random vampire thinks Renesmee is immortal, or why the Volturi accept her opinion without any proof. Much of the film is then taken up with Edward’s clan seeking “witnesses” from all over the world (including a pair of old-school Transylvanian vampires) who’ll testify to Renesmee’s true nature. It’s not clear why this testimony will make any difference, or why they don’t just call up the vampire who made the initial accusation. Alas, the Volturi are adamant, and it all ends in a battle where it transpires the way to kill a vampire is to tear off his/her head, then set fire to the headless body. It’s not clear why you have to burn the torso after cutting off the head. Will the head magically jump back on? If so, does it ever attach itself backwards, so you get vampires shuffling around with their heads pointing in the wrong direction?
The battle itself is cool, however, black-clad figures in the snow à la 30 Days of Night, vampires and werewolves intent on tearing each other’s heads off (the violence is intense, albeit bloodless). “Yo-o-oung Bel-la, immortality becomes you,” purrs Michael Sheen as the chief Volturi, then gives an alarming high-pitched giggle. Fun stuff happens on the sidelines: vampires tell war stories, while Edward thanks his mentor Carlisle for “this extraordinary life”. Yet it must be said, again, that the plotting is flimsy. Renesmee isn’t really immortal, say Bella and her crew. Yes, you’re right, this has all been a big misunderstanding, reply the Volturi – but never mind, we’ll kill you anyway. Maybe it worked better in the book.
And what of Bella’s wonderful empowerment? Does she lead the troops in battle, taking control of her destiny? Well, not really. Every vampire has some kind of special power, and Bella’s power (it turns out) is to be a “shield”. She’s a good shield, emitting a force-field that blocks other vampires’ weapons, and she uses her powers to defend herself and others. So much for Bella the take-charge tomboy! 
No surprise that the change in our heroine is short-lived: every franchise has a guiding sensibility – and Twilight is a franchise built on fear, specifically fear of sex. Bella and Edward have been ‘shields’ from the very beginning, passive-aggressively blocking each other’s urges (the first three instalments prized “self-control”, then the fourth one revealed sex as painful and bruising). These characters have always been repressed – but maybe their daughter Renesmee will be different in future episodes, which you just know are in the pipeline. “She’s going to be around for a long time, isn’t she?” asks Jacob at the end. “A very long time,” comes the ominous reply. That’s why they call it a saga. 

Yeah, yeah. I know it's damn long. But you have been warned.

A blogger regards ^__^

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Today?

It's super hectic for me!!! But like usual, Nurul Izzah Binti Razaman, my friend, save the day for me. Thank you, friend TT_TT

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